Disclaimer and Non-Affiliation Statement

This website is a parody and satire project created solely for entertainment, commentary, and educational purposes.

Symplex by Johnson's Control is not a real company and does not provide fire alarm installation, monitoring, inspection, testing, maintenance, engineering, consulting, emergency response, or any other fire protection or life safety services.

This website is not affiliated with, endorsed by, sponsored by, authorized by, or connected in any way with Simplex®, SimplexGrinnell®, Tyco®, Johnson Controls®, Johnson Controls International plc, or any of their subsidiaries, affiliates, employees, contractors, distributors, products, or services.

Any references to trademarks, trade names, logos, products, services, companies, or brands are used solely for parody, commentary, or nominative reference purposes. All trademarks and registered trademarks remain the property of their respective owners.

No information presented on this website should be relied upon for fire protection, life safety planning, code compliance, emergency response, building safety decisions, or any other professional purpose.

If you require actual fire alarm service, monitoring, inspection, engineering, or emergency assistance, contact a qualified and licensed fire protection professional or call emergency services as appropriate.

The operators of this website make no representations or warranties regarding the accuracy, completeness, reliability, suitability, or availability of any information presented herein and expressly disclaim all liability arising from the use of this website.

By accessing this website, you acknowledge and agree that this website is fictional in nature and that no business relationship, contractual relationship, service agreement, or professional relationship is created through its use.

Last Updated: January 2026